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Post by copper on Sept 28, 2021 19:50:23 GMT
This is a phenomenon that's been concerning for a long time with Catholic families-- we see people not getting married, and not having children.
I have a small baby who won't have much for practicing Catholic relatives. Unless her cousins decide to join the Church (which is unlikely based on their parents), in her generation, she will be the ONLY Catholic. My side's not Christian, and my husband's side of the family is very small. He has no cousins on one side. It's kind of depressing to see how only my FIL got married and had children.
How do young people in today's world living in these circumstances, remain steadfast in the faith without people in their lives to guide and support them in the faith? As a new parent, I find this utterly depressing to comprehend. How do parents in these circumstances feel confident about raising their children in these situations?
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Post by pianistclare on Sept 28, 2021 20:11:51 GMT
it's your job as a parent. The catechesis of a child lies with the parent FIRST, and with the parish community and its catechists as a support system. Raise you child by sharing your faith, reading Scripture and Biblical parables to her, and then enroll her in Faith Formation at the parish level as soon as she is old enough. Support her catechists and volunteer.
learns.
Peace to you,
Clare
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Post by StellaMaris on Sept 28, 2021 20:41:17 GMT
I completely agree with what Clare says here. You are the most important person in your sons life and his formation for a long time to come. I remember reading an interview with a bunch of seminarians from around Australia who came together for the world youth day in 2000. One of the questions they were asked was who was it that was most important for their faith formation and the vast majority said their mother. Of course fathers have their role in formation of their children, but mothers have a special gift imparted through their maternal love. Allow yourself to be full of Gods grace like Mary did. God bless.
Edit: apologies, I assumed wrongly your child was male.
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Post by jimg on Sept 29, 2021 3:24:15 GMT
I grew up in a family with five children. At that time, nearly all the fhe families in my neighborhood, whether Catholic or not, consisted of mom, dad, and 4 or 5 children. I recall only one neighbor who had only 2 children.
I enjoyed all my brothers and sister; we were good companions and confidantes. And our parents knew that we would watch out for one another. Since my parents both came from large families who produced large families, we had lots of cousins. I was glad when my last brother was born, 13 years younger than me. It meant that as a teenager, I would get to babysit a toddler. I learned a lot from that.
Now as we grow older, we are still a comfort to one another. But we are down from five to three.
I regret that large families--and even marriage, have fallen out of favor. I feel a little sorry for those who have no siblings.
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Post by katy777 on Sept 29, 2021 23:34:46 GMT
Yes and you start early. Pop up books with Noah's ark etc and beautiful pictures of Jesus with Children. Then when your baby gets older, coloring pages and toddler bible. You can have your baby sit on your lap when you say rosary too. It's unfair to Catholic school teachers and religious ed to provide all religious instruction. Everyone should be teaching religion at home and filling gaps. And God decides how many children are enough for a family. And then adoption too
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Post by copper on Sept 30, 2021 6:10:15 GMT
it's your job as a parent. The catechesis of a child lies with the parent FIRST, and with the parish community and its catechists as a support system. Raise you child by sharing your faith, reading Scripture and Biblical parables to her, and then enroll her in Faith Formation at the parish level as soon as she is old enough. Support her catechists and volunteer. learns. Peace to you, Clare Unfortunately, I don't think I'm that well-catechized...and my husband doesn't see our catechesis as important as I do. He was raised Catholic and attended Catholic school, and believes that's all there is to it. |
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Post by copper on Sept 30, 2021 6:12:03 GMT
I completely agree with what Clare says here. You are the most important person in your sons life and his formation for a long time to come. I remember reading an interview with a bunch of seminarians from around Australia who came together for the world youth day in 2000. One of the questions they were asked was who was it that was most important for their faith formation and the vast majority said their mother. Of course fathers have their role in formation of their children, but mothers have a special gift imparted through their maternal love. Allow yourself to be full of Gods grace like Mary did. God bless. Edit: apologies, I assumed wrongly your child was male. What's really interesting about this, is there was a study a few years back that found the strongest indicator of whether a child continues to follow a faith is if the father is practicing. Not so much the mother, although maternal participation was a factor. |
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Post by StellaMaris on Sept 30, 2021 7:42:45 GMT
I completely agree with what Clare says here. You are the most important person in your sons life and his formation for a long time to come. I remember reading an interview with a bunch of seminarians from around Australia who came together for the world youth day in 2000. One of the questions they were asked was who was it that was most important for their faith formation and the vast majority said their mother. Of course fathers have their role in formation of their children, but mothers have a special gift imparted through their maternal love. Allow yourself to be full of Gods grace like Mary did. God bless. Edit: apologies, I assumed wrongly your child was male. What's really interesting about this, is there was a study a few years back that found the strongest indicator of whether a child continues to follow a faith is if the father is practicing. Not so much the mother, although maternal participation was a factor. Sorry for the loss of hope you are feeling based on your research. Perhaps just pray. |
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Post by ralfy on Oct 4, 2021 0:09:00 GMT
It's taking place even for non-Catholic families; i.e., declining birth rates, etc., in industrialized countries.
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Post by katy777 on Oct 4, 2021 16:18:30 GMT
Yes and people are getting married later.
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Post by ralfy on Oct 5, 2021 1:45:46 GMT
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Post by tth1 on Oct 13, 2021 16:58:20 GMT
I think we should be careful about jumping to conclusions. It is not always through personal choice that people only have a small number of children. I am one of two siblings. That is because my mother could have no more children after my younger brother was born. It wasn't because my parents didn't want more children or because they were doing anything contrary to the Catholic Faith. I am happy to say I later gained a sister when my mother re-married following the untimely death of my father whilst I was still a child. Although technically my step-sister I regard her as nothing but my true sister. Our brother emigrated so that leaves us two locally and we are very close.
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Post by copper on Nov 5, 2021 3:55:21 GMT
I think we should be careful about jumping to conclusions. It is not always through personal choice that people only have a small number of children. I am one of two siblings. That is because my mother could have no more children after my younger brother was born. It wasn't because my parents didn't want more children or because they were doing anything contrary to the Catholic Faith. I am happy to say I later gained a sister when my mother re-married following the untimely death of my father whilst I was still a child. Although technically my step-sister I regard her as nothing but my true sister. Our brother emigrated so that leaves us two locally and we are very close. Oh, I understand and by no means was this post intended to be an indictment toward those who couldn't have more children. I myself only have 1 (so far). What I am getting at is the current culture of finding it favorable to have a small family (or none), whether it's by choosing childlessness or limiting a family to 1 or 2 children. That's why I mentioned people not getting married or having children. I've met a lot of single Catholics in their 30's who've made decisions not to move forward to marry and have children. The result is we end up with a culture that favors childless single people, rather than families, and we end up with a culture that sees community ties slowly weakened or completely destroyed. One thing I've read that seems true to me is we can't have community without extended family, and we can't have extended family without having children. |
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Post by tth1 on Nov 5, 2021 16:00:12 GMT
I think we should be careful about jumping to conclusions. It is not always through personal choice that people only have a small number of children. I am one of two siblings. That is because my mother could have no more children after my younger brother was born. It wasn't because my parents didn't want more children or because they were doing anything contrary to the Catholic Faith. I am happy to say I later gained a sister when my mother re-married following the untimely death of my father whilst I was still a child. Although technically my step-sister I regard her as nothing but my true sister. Our brother emigrated so that leaves us two locally and we are very close. Oh, I understand and by no means was this post intended to be an indictment toward those who couldn't have more children. I myself only have 1 (so far). What I am getting at is the current culture of finding it favorable to have a small family (or none), whether it's by choosing childlessness or limiting a family to 1 or 2 children. That's why I mentioned people not getting married or having children. I've met a lot of single Catholics in their 30's who've made decisions not to move forward to marry and have children. The result is we end up with a culture that favors childless single people, rather than families, and we end up with a culture that sees community ties slowly weakened or completely destroyed. One thing I've read that seems true to me is we can't have community without extended family, and we can't have extended family without having children. I think those times have gone. That is because society has changed. People do move further away from their place of birth than they used to do ad often family ties aren' as strong. I remember as a child regularly attending big family gatherings but that is because everyone lived reasonably close. Now they don't happen because people live much further away and they are far more difficult to organise. My two sons went to university and both have found jobs nearer there than home. So even if people were to have larger families I do not think we would have the community with extended family you mention.
Society has changed in other ways too. When I was a child I knew all our neighbours and they were all counted on a s friends. If anyone needed help they would help out. My mother still lives in the same house and is fortunate that those immediately around her are the sam epeople. However, most houses on her street are occupied my people who keep themselves to themselves. I only know my neighbours to say hello to if I see them. I do not know their names and I wouldn't think of acalling on them if I needed help.
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Post by copper on Nov 6, 2021 4:03:59 GMT
Well, we can't entirely be surprised at the state of the Church and with church communities, can we? It seems like people have accepted the idea of "times have changed" with a level of complacency. The way I see it, it's a choice. We can choose to actively work toward changing things to have more sanity, or we can continue to make choices that create difficulties for our children.
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